1. One of the things I didn't expect about Trump as President is how often he backs down. He caves a lot.
2. This was an obvious time to cave since, you know, the EU doesn't actually have any of the supposedly "unfair" trade practices that Trump was telling them to end. (Can you ever hear the word, "unfair," again after Trump? Or, does it now just sound like, "bigly?")
3. What Trump actually wants is to declare victory. One of the most important lines for understanding Trump came from what he told his aides before assuming office. According to the New York Times, "think of each presidential day as an episode in a television show in which he vanquishes rivals." This really is critical to understanding Trump.
4. As long as Trump can spin an outcome as a victory, then, that's the only thing that matters to him. This is how you negotiate with him, then. You don't have to concede. You don't have to give him anything. North Korea didn't give him anything! All you have to do is make sure he has a way to pretend that he won something. Keep in mind that he is the most shameless, craven liar in history, and he will always claim that whatever happened, he won the biggest victory in the history of victories.
5. What happened with Europe? Jean-Claude Juncker actually used color-laden flash cards in an attempt to explain trade to Donny Trump. Either those flash cards really succeeded where Wharton failed, or something else happened. I'm going with Option B. Trump is incapable of learning. Someone explained to Trump that there is an easier path for him.
6. Just declare victory! He's going to lie anyway, so skip the tariffs, let the economy keep growing, which is the only thing keeping his presidency afloat, and declare victory now.
And here's where things get really scary for the GOP...
7. As you may have noticed, I am... rather dismissive of the intellectual capacities of our Dear Leader. Congressional Republicans are dumber than Donald Trump.
There. I said it. Let that sink it, with all of its disturbing implications. Yes, among that crowd, Donny is what passes for the smart one.
Don't worry. I'm going to wash my hands after I type this post, and say a thousand "Hail Newtons." That's Isaac, not Leroy Gingrich.
OK, now here's what I mean. Remember the GOP's healthcare debacles from 2017? Why did that happen? Well, right after the 2016 election, I kept writing that the easiest path for the party would be to do a few small-bore bills so that they could repeatedly declare victory, and never bother getting around to the "replace" part of "repeal-and-replace," because that was so obviously a scam anyway. Repeal the employer mandate. Yay, victory! Repeal the medical device tax. Yay, victory! Keep digging through Obamacare and finding small pieces to repeal, hold press conferences every time Donny signs a new "repeal" component, wait for the novelty to wear off, and move on. Point being, if you can't have a real victory, just declare victory. This was my core argument, back from 2016, and through the healthcare mess of 2017. Instead, the GOP kept stepping on rakes, Sideshow Bob-style.
Yeah, that's still funny. Anyway, you know who appears to be doing this better? I hate to say it, but... Tr... I can't type it.
Here's the thing, though. No, trade wars are not good, and no, they are not easy to win. You know what is at least better than fighting them? Just declaring victory. That's also smarter than what the GOP did in 2017 on healthcare. Just declare victory.
So, Trump got himself into a mess by starting a trade war with Europe over some delusional nonsense. What's the best way out? Well, if you are Trump, just declare victory. The trade war appears to be pausing. Trump will declare victory. And that makes him sm... smar... less stupid than congressional Republicans. He is handling this better than they handled healthcare last year. Granted, that's a low bar, but hey, this is a party stupid enough to elect Donald Trump as President, so hey, what do you want?
